O magazine Magic Mushroom September Cover 2017

Beautiful  Oprah has found Magic Mushrooms

Who thought of this?

 Aside from the fact that the  O magazine is too expensive for me... what keeps me from buying it off the Newsstand is the cover.  It's a little weird that Oprah graces every one and has the same "happy happy" smile on her face ALWAYS.  I have kept silent largely due to the fact that this women is a Guru and has changed my life in ways I never thought possible. I also know she's sensitive to criticism but she has  a great sense of humor so I'd like to think of this as a cute observation.

OPRAH is "Showing up for Life!" dressed like a Crazy Lady

Stop for a moment and take a look at the Uber hypo-Manic cover. Rest asured if I arrived at my psychiatrist''s office announcing that I was "showing up for life" wearing that outfit he'd up my medication. He might even make a phone call or two.

Let's explore the semiology of this photo and I will  explain why it's bad on so many levels.   Look at her eyes. Notice anything?
Because of the truckloads of mascara they look like alien eyes. Creepy 

And look at the outfit.  Please fire your stylist Oprah!

In this photo narrative, we are supposed to believe that  Oprah has just picked every flower that grows in her garden and has "Shown up for Life".

Judging from the sun it seems like the picture was taken around noon.  It  is clearly hot outside because it's not quite Fall . But Oprah is ready for the season change because despite the heat she is wearing a heavy sweater in a  dull purple grey that looks like it's been overused. Oprah. Why are you wearing this heavy sweater?

And lets look at the "elephant "in the room, the piece de résistance , the "Crazy Lady" skirt.  Oprah, what are you doing running around trippping over a pink sparkly skirt that drags sloppily on the ground picking way too many flowers in a garden that has only bushes? The skirt is just plain nuts.

Did she find some magic mushrooms among the flowers?

We are supposed to believe  that Oprah shows up in the garden in her Manic Mushroom Outfit and begins to search for flowers ripping them out of the ground with her squeaky clean hands  and places them in a wooden basket.

And if that were not enough please look at the boots. On this hot spring day while Oprah is searching for wildflowers  tripping over  her sparkly pick skirt  she decides to put on a pair of ugly green  rain boots. But these are not  just any boots. On this bright sunny day in which the grass is as dry as a bone she chooses to wear rubber boots. Yep!  Rubber boots which everyone knows get  hot and sweaty in the rain never mind the hot sun.




ILike I said it's  a Magic mushroom day in the garden with Oprah!  Bring on the men in white and whatever you do don't try this at home...or anywhere. You will not be showing up for life you'll be showing up for medication.